TITLE: Always Have, Always Will

AUTHOR: snjardd

PAIRING: J/N, Appearances of Simon Andy and Roger

RATING: NC - 17

ARCHIVING: yeah that’s cool just let me know

MISC: A huge thank you to madtheo and rhodiva helping me on my first DD fic and for putting up with all of my really bad spelling and grammar. Thank you again.

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John was rocking to the rhythm of the last song of the night, well not exactly, it was the song before they went off and listened to the crowd as they chanted and screamed for more. Then the group would go back out and play one or two more songs.

He had his head slightly tilted down and his eyes closed, as he strummed his bass and the friction of his movements was causing the most amazing feeling in his groin, but then again it didn’t matter what song it was; they all had this effect on him, just usually not this bad.

As he swayed, his thoughts drifted back to other times, when he would look at or think about a certain person and feel the most incredible feelings, that was the affect they had on him. He remembered the first kiss, touch, smell. The way their eyes danced when they laughed, and the smile that always lit up the room no matter what was happening. He was jolted back to reality when he realized that the song was finishing and Simon was looking at him funny, John just smiled and raised his eyebrows.

Knowing he had to take his bass off worried him some as he was still quite erect, he turned and placed his bass on its stand and spotted a towel hanging on the corner of the frame “Thank fuck for that” he said softly.

He grabbed the towel, wiped his face and hands, then tucked the towel into the front of his pants as he and the others waved and bowed for the fans. As they left the stage he was grateful for the towel and to the person who put it there.

**********

From where he stood on stage, Nick could see everyone and nearly everything. He watched John and knew straight away what was happening, “I wonder who he is thinking about this time, probably some bird that gave him a mind-numbing blow job” He thought with a little jealousy.

He and John had known each other since they were very young and they had experimented with each other, kissing and such, for practice they used to say, but it never went any further than that.

Nick had always hidden his true feelings for John, scared that they would lose everything they had. But watching him tonight brought back all of those feelings. Tonight he was finally going to let John know his true feelings.

The band went back on and played the encore, before heading off stage back to their dressing room, Nick made the point of leaving the stage so he could wait for John. He kept himself occupied talking to a roadie until he saw John coming down the stairs.

Nick grabbed John's arm and shushed him when he saw him about to say something, motioning with his head for John to follow. John's eyebrow went up but he followed his friend, letting Nick drag him into an unused room at the far end of the corridor. Nick looked up and down the corridor to make sure they weren't followed and pushed John inside.

“What the bloody hell are we doing in here, Nick?” John said with humor and annoyance

Nick just smiled as he closed the door

“ I asked you a question, Bates” John said getting irritated. Nick turned and moved in closer to John without touching him but making sure that John could feel how close.

“I was watching you out there during the last song” the keyboardist said as he traced a finger down John’s bare arm, causing John to shiver at the contact.

“ You were?” he stammered.

“Yes, and I just know you were thinking of some bimbo who got on her knees for you” Nick said with a slight hint of venom in his voice.

John’s eyebrow raised and he studied his friend, hooking his finger under Nick's chin lifting the younger man’s head so he could see into his eyes “You're not jealous of the fact that these women are willing to do this for me, are you?" he asked with a mischievous smile.

Nick was about to answer but was cut short by John's mouth on his. Nick made a squeaking noise that quickly turned into a deep-throated moan. He grabbed John and pulled him in closer. He wanted to feel the throb of his pulse, wanted to feel a part of him. John turned them around so that Nick was against wall, placing his knee between Nick's legs as they continued to kiss.

They only broke apart when they realized that oxygen was becoming an issue. Both panting hard and fast, they stood for a moment and stared into each others eyes, not saying anything. Just breathing.

John broke eye contact first when he went down to his knees and he had Nick's hardness in his mouth before Nick could protest. "Fuck" was all that came out. John moaned and the sensations that it caused sent Nick nearly over the edge "Oh My God" he cried, tangling his fingers into John's hair while he slowly fucked his face. "Close," he panted. John pulled his head back causing Nick to let go of his hair, leaving just the head in his mouth, preparing for the spray he knew would hit the back of his throat.

He wrapped his arms around Nick’s ass and held onto him as he finished his orgasm. John slowly stood and kissed Nick hard and deep, Nick tasting himself on John's tongue.

“ I Want to fuck you” John whispered as he nipped Nicks ear.

“ Oh Jesus, yes” Nick moaned into John’s chest.

"Do you have anything, ‘cause I don’t," John whispered. Nick froze and looked up at him.

“Fuck, don't tell me that we have to wait. God, I don't think I can" John ran his fingers through Nick’s hair and sighed. “Looks like Nicky. Sorry.”

"Maybe we should get back anyway, you know before the guys send a search party for us,” John said as he fixed himself up.

"But what about you, you didn't get to …. You know" Nick said with a little disappointment, looking down at John's crotch.

"That's ok. Plan on doing that later, in you," John said as he pulled Nick in for a searing final kiss. Spinning on his heel, he left Nick standing there, wide-eyed and panting.

“Oh Jesus," was all he could muster.

John walked into the dressing room and sat down on the armchair that was surprisingly free, as if he had been there the whole time. "Hey Charley, since your up, pass me a water."

Simon tossed a fresh bottle backward over his head without hesitation. "There you go, Johnny" Luckily he sent it in the right direction or people would have been diving out of the way.

"Ta," John said as he opened it and took a huge swig.

Nick strolled in and went straight to his favorite video game and started playing. Neither could believe that they weren't missed and they stole glances at each other with small knowing smiles.

After a while the silence was broken by Simon. "Oi, I'm fuckin’ knackered! Who wants to go back to the hotel?"

“Yeah” both Andy and John said “ I really need some fuckin sleep” Andy added.

Roger who was laying on the couch nearly asleep said "Yeah, me too," he was still holding his heart from when Simon spoke and scared the shit out of him.

Nick looked up when he heard John speak. "Yeah ok, let's go" John said and started out the door. Three of the band members got into one limo while Nick and John headed for a second one that was waiting.

Simon called out, “Nah, boys, lets all ride together. Be fun, hey?" They all just rolled their eyes and climbed in together.

Somehow Nick ended up on John's lap as they arranged themselves so they were all comfy. Andy ended up on the floor which was fine with him because he fit just right.

John moved so that he had is back to the other guys but they didn't notice because they were all joking around. By John doing this, it meant that Nick could slide back and be sitting half on the seat with his legs over John’s. From this position, John could put his hand on Nick's already hardening crotch and put a little bit of pressure on it, making Nick moan and buck his hips up to meet John's hand. "You asshole" he mouthed.

John just smiled his sexiest smile and pushed down again, making Nick yell “Fuck!” rather loudly. This got the others attention.

"All right there, Nick?" Simon asked with a bit of concern.

"Yeah, stupid arm rest digging in where it shouldn't is all" he replied, glaring at John, then cracking a smile at the look on the bassist’s face. “Why is it that we are all cramped into this … oh yeah. That's right. ‘It will be fun.’ Thanks Charley" he said sarcastically, with a roll of his eyes.

"Aw, come on Nicky, not long now, ey?" said Simon with a cheesy grin.

"Don't you ever get sick of being so fuckin’ cheery all the time, Charley?" Andy asked as he went to light up a smoke. Roger grabbed the cigarette before he could ignite it.

"Don't even think about it. You can wait five bloody minutes, can't ya?"

Andy just looked at him and grabbed another smoke "All righ, Rog, all righ. Keep ya fuckin’ hair on,” he smiled.

They pulled up to the hotel and piled out, Andy lighting up the smoke he had hanging from his lip. Roger shook his head at him and laughed.

Looking around, Simon noticed John and Nick running for the hotel entrance and started to call out when he sees the crowd of fans coming toward them. "Oh Fuck," he says, causing Andy and Roger to look in the same direction that he was. "Fuck," they both said.

Nick and John laughed at the guys out the front because they had noticed the girls before the others had which is why they had made the dash for the hotel. The last view they had of the others was of them being swarmed. "God, that was funny," John gasped out. All Nick could do was nod.

They turned and walked into the lift, heading up to their floor. “Meet me in my room in twenty minutes," John said

“Ok,” was Nick’s reply. After the doors slid open, they walked to their rooms which happened to be right across from each other.

They stood there looking at each other. "You want me to bring…." Nick started. "No, just you" John cut him off. He glanced up and down the corridor, and seeing no one around, he stepped forward and kissed Nick hard. He then turned around and entered his room "Twenty minutes"

The last thing he heard was Nick saying, "Ok" before the door slid shut.

Nick stood with his back against the inside of his door, his fingers running softly along his lips. He jumped slightly at a bang on his door. Opening it up, he turned and looked out, seeing Andy, Simon and Roger "Thanks a lot ya wankers". Nick chuckled to himself as he heard their three doors close one after the other.

He chose to wear a pair of silk Pj bottoms, specifically because John was the one who gave them to him and it was so very appropriate that he be the one to take them off. He wrapped a robe around himself and started towards John's door.

Before John even had the chance to move away from the door, he was pinned to it by Nick and his mouth was invaded by Nick's tongue. John returned the kiss then pulled away "Hello to you too," he smiled.

Nick blushed. "Wanted to kiss you again, and also a bit nervous about … this" he said gesturing around the room.

Nick laughed and relaxed as he walked over to the window and looked out at Sydney. "Man, this place is beautiful. Wouldn't mind living here forever."

John walked up and snaked his arms around Nick's waist, pulling him back into him. "Nah, you would miss England way to much."

John looked down at his friend and whispered "I would miss you too, Nicky," placing a small kiss on Nick's forehead.

Removing Nicks arms from around his neck, he took his hands and started to walk backward toward the bed, never taking his eyes off of Nick. He turned them so that Nick now had his back to the bed and John was in front of him. John let go of his hands and untied his robe, pushing it off of his shoulders and letting it fall to the ground. "Lie down".

John stopped and shifted bringing Nick’s knees to lie between his own. Running his hands up both of Nick’s outer thighs, John smirked as he heard a slight moan from the keyboardist.

John continued to run his hands up Nick’s sides, making him arch up, wanting more than just Johns hands on him. John flicked his tongue out over one of his nipples, loving the sounds coming from his friend, who was finally at his mercy.

John moved down Nick’s body, kissing as he went, until he arrived at the waistband of Nick’s pants. Slowly pulling them down over his hips, Nick raised himself off of the bed, cock springing free, to help with the removal process.

John leaned down and licked the tip making Nick gasp in surprise. He held the base in his hand and licked making Nick whimper, "Oh god".

John smiled and took the entire length into his mouth and throat, causing Nick to grab the sheets and rise up to meet John’s mouth "Oh Fuck' Nick sighed. John kept up his ministrations on Nick's cock and balls. "Close" Nick whispered, barely hearing the words himself. Knowing how close Nick was, John readied himself.

After Nick exploded into his mouth, John looked up into the hazel eyes of the man that he knew he loved, and decided that tonight he would show him just how much. He crawled all the way back up and looked down at Nick, bringing his head down as Nick rose up to meet his kiss. Nick could taste himself on John’s tongue, making him want him even more.

"Want you so bad, Nicky," John whispered in his ear as he nipped it.

"Yes, Johnny, please now."

John didn't need anymore telling. He reached for the drawer beside the bed where he had put the lube and condoms. Nick watched as John took his pants off and threw them on top of his.

"I know, I will. Just relax ok, Nicky" John soothed.

Nick relaxed and John pressed into him up to the first knuckle. "That's it baby, let me in." Nick sighed and let out a long breath. As he did so, John eased in the finger as far as it could go "Ok there?" he asked, looking at Nick, who in turn had his eyes closed with the most orgasmic look on his face, nodded that he was ok.

John felt Nick push on his finger so he started to move it in and out, every now and then hitting the spot that caused stars to spark in Nicks head.

"Like that, huh?'

"Oh yeah, more, please".

John now pushed two fingers in and waited till Nick adjusted to the feeling again. He felt Nick push against him so he started first with in and out then a scissor motion to open him up more.

"Oh god, John, please now" Nick gasped out.

"You want me to fuck you baby?" John asked in his ear, licking the outside of it, causing Nick to inhale sharply.

"Yeeeessssss" he pleaded. John leaned up and gave him a searing kiss before rolling on a condom and applying lube to it and some more to Nick’s hole.

John lifted Nick’s other leg to his shoulder and positioned himself at Nick’s entrance. He slowly pushed in as Nick hissed from the pain. John stopped with just the head inside until Nick got used to the feeling.

When he knew Nick was ready, he pushed in further until he was fully encased in Nick. "Jesus, So tight," he panted, as he too had to adjust to the feeling. Nick started to slowly rock his hips, letting John know that he was ready for him to fuck him. At first John went slowly, but as Nick got used to his size and the feeling of being so full, he picked up the pace.

Nick grabbed John’s ass and pulled him in deeper. "Harder. Faster" he panted. That was all John needed, he sped up, really hammering into Nick.

"Oh Fuck, Nicky" he gasped, knowing that he wouldn't last much longer "Nearly there," he told Nick who nodded that he was close too.

Nick laid his head back down on the pillows. John bent down and kissed him hard. "Look at me. I want to see your face when you come" he demanded. He reached between them and grasped Nick's penis in his hand and started to pump in time with his thrusts.

"I'm gonna come - " Nick gasped out and shot over his chest, stomach and Johns hand. The contractions of his orgasm tightened around John's cock making him come a few seconds later

"Nicky" John moaned as he came deep inside of him.

John collapsed on Nick, breathing hard. Nick encircled his neck and kissed his temples.

"Wow that was excellent, John," he said, kissing his hair.

"Yeah, it was," John said as he looked up to kiss Nick. He slowly pulled out of him and disposed of the condom into the bin.

He reached for his cigarettes and lit one, handing another to Nick.

"Thanks, and not just for the smoke," Nick said, as he took a drag..

"My pleasure, Nicky." John flushed slightly with pleasure. They sat there smoking for a while, no words passing between them. None were needed.

"I was thinking of you," John said breaking the silence.

"Huh?" Nick was puzzled, at first not taking his meaning.” You know, on stage. The Chauffer"

"You were?" Nick responded, not being able to hide the surprise in his voice.

"Always Nicky, because you are the one I’ve always wanted," Nick sat there, wide eyed and mouth agape. "All those women, nothing compared to you".

"Really" Nick said still a bit taken aback.

"I Love You Nicky, always have and always will" Nick didn't give him a chance to say anything else before he was up and straddling John devouring his mouth. When they broke for air, Nick leaned down and nibbled John’s earlobe and whispered,

"Me too, Johnny. Always have, always will".